By Kat Radley
California is currently experiencing a very serious drought. State officials have asked citizens to make small changes in their daily lives to conserve water, such as watering your lawn less, which, let’s face it, is a way rich and braggy people can help out, but what about everyone else? Let’s all go one step further and skip Shower Sex.
No more Shower Sex? I know. It’s a crazy proposition. I realize how important Shower Sex is (I capitalized it as a proper noun, didn’t I?) but hear me out. The environment, wildlife, and the future of my unborn child–who is going to become a mechanical engineer prodigy at age eleven so Mama can retire early–depends on it.
The only way we are going to get through this drought is if we are willing to make some significant sacrifices, and I‘m not talking about bathing your dog less frequently, which by the way, who gives a shit if your pit bull smells like his own feces for an extra day? (And that goes for you, too, Pitbull the rapper.)